Cycle 3, Day 4

Thursday 21st February 2019
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” — Albert Einstein

Day 4 of Cycles 1 & 2 had been pretty much like normal days having had a good nights sleep, so I expected much the same today. As you might have guessed, I was up 4 times in the night to pee. One was a really close call, waking up in the middle of a dream where clearly I needed to go to the toilet, and had to hop out of bed pretty quick ! I got back to sleep straight away each time, and woke up when Jayne was getting ready for work feeling quite ok.

This Day 4 was a little different. I’ve felt really lethargic all day. It took me until about 10am to summon the will power to drag myself out of bed. I said I’d go to Costco with Dad and the kids, who are off for half term, at lunchtime to eat and pick up some things we needed. I pretty much sat on the sofa from 10am until 11.30am when he picked us up. I had no appetite up until about 11am, so no breakfast today. I think I’ve left my appetite somewhere and forgotten where it is.

We went out, and I struggled to eat all of my smaller than usual lunch. We did our shopping and headed home, walking around was fine when I was up and about. I bought another shrub for the garden and thought I could plant it when I got home.

When we got home, it was back to the sofa for a while and I didn’t feel like moving. After an hour or so, I went out to plant the shrub which took all of 10 minutes and returned to the sofa. About 4.30pm, it was nap time on the sofa which again is unusual for a Day 4, this is usually a Day 7 onwards affair. I slept until about 5.45pm and made some tea for me and the boys. Again I had a smaller portion than usual, and couldn’t quite finish it off.

It only really occurred to me at this point, the last two times I’ve been discharged I’ve come away with 2 days of steroids and anti sickness tablets. This time I didn’t get any, just 3 days of Filgrastim Injections. I’m not quite sure why this is, and in my haste to leave yesterday I didn’t inspect the bag of goodies they gave me. I’m guessing they may have made a little difference to how I was feeling today, and that not having them is why I’ve not had as normal a Day 4 as in the last 2 cycles.

About 8pm, I went out to pick up one of the things I found for my garden project while I was wide awake at 5am in hospital. I found it on facebook, 20 minutes down the road and the chap was really nice, I stood chatting to him for a little while. I’ll go out in the morning if I feel ok to pick up some more ingredients for my garden project, and if I can drag my lazy ass of the sofa I might start some prep.

Jayne got me a voucher at Xmas for a cycling coach, which is awesome because later in the year when I’m back up and running I can use the coaching to help achieve some of my goals and maybe set different ones. It took the shine off it knowing I had this treatment ahead, but I’m off to meet the coach for a brew tomorrow and chat through what we can do when the time comes. With most of the chemo behind me, it’s easier to focus on the good things ahead, like this, because there’s less between me and it now.

Today was one of those days where my mind wanted to keep moving, but unusually my body was one step behind. I’ve not had many days like that. When I’ve been physically tired, I’ve been mentally tired too. I fully expect Cycle 3 to hit harder than the previous two, because I’m starting from a lower point, I wonder if the lack of drugs thing has contributed. Either way I’ll get a good nights sleep tonight to recharge, and play along as usual, finding my way as I go.