Friday 1st February 2019
“True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and exercise of the body; the two are ever united” — Wilhelm von Humboldt

Another good night’s sleep behind me, and I felt well enough to walk the kids to school as I’d hoped. Full wooly bobble hat and big coat required for the morning cold. A little later I went shopping for bread, milk and the basics with Dad to get some supplies, and we had lunch out.

My biggest problem today has been taste again. I said yesterday my taste had gone off a bit again like cycle 1, but today it has seemed worse than ever and I’ve had no enjoyment at all from my food today. Breakfast bagels were very bland, lunchtime posh hotdogs with ‘chup tasted gooey and flavourless. I cooked us a Gammon roast dinner for our Friday night in, even had some pigs in blankets in the freezer from Xmas, and it tasted awful (for me, the others enjoyed it!) Drinking too, Vimto and juice is really bland, even Cherry Pepsi Max I had at lunch, and I definitely haven’t drunk enough today. I’ll just have to force that issue or I’ll feel more ropey. Must. Stay. Hydrated. Although I recall this only lasted a few days last time, I can’t wait for it to go away.

I decided that if my Filgrastim injections have been causing some tiredness, then this time I’ll inject them before bed each night, so my body does the hard work reacting to them while I’m asleep. I have no medical advice on that, but it seems logical so I’ll give it a try. So far so good, I did it about 10pm last night and I’ve felt quite energetic today compared to last week.

Early afternoon, I have to say I was pretty bored and my mind was wandering. As I’ve said before, I don’t do boredom. Jayne was working from home so I tried to stay out of the way and let her work. Feeling relatively good physically today, I mulled over (as I have numerous times the last few weeks but always decided against) taking the mountain bike out for a very gentle ride, i.e. the bike equivalent of walking pace. My usual style on the bike is flat out or nothing, so it would be a considered effort to go easy. Most of the snow has gone here, and I would put the bobbly tyres back on it to be sure.

After careful consideration I thought sod it, it’s Friday. I’ll only ruin my weekend if it doesn’t work out and I can still recover Sat/Sun then focus on being back in a routine from Monday. So off I went. Thick pants, thickest cycling jacket I have, layers, wooly hat, face/neck warmer and winter cycling boots, I sure wouldn’t get cold.

It was bloody brilliant, I smiled the whole way. When I say the whole way, I managed 3.5 miles with a few stops to take pictures, riding for about 20 minutes in total on and off. I didn’t go hard enough to get tired legs, I didn’t get to the point of being out of breath, and I’ve been advised not to get out of breath so I heeded that advice. I kept an eye on my heart rate too and it was more than sensible. Mentally though, it felt just a little bit like a normal day, just enough to give that little buzz. A short independence from it all, it felt a little like rehab.

I guess you are wondering at what point during the remainder of the day I fell into a pile of jelly, and napped for 3 hours. I’m as surprised as anyone to say that when I got back in from my brief foray, I actually felt energised. Yes, energised, and surprised. I haven’t felt tired or lethargic since. I walked to get the kids from school again, felt fine after that too. I’m still going strong now at about 8.30pm.

I’ll not be getting carried away, a 20 min ride and a few walks doesn’t reflect peak physical condition. On the flip side, it shows I’m not dead in the water. I’d love to do it again but I know the chemo has a drawn out effect and in theory I should feel worse each day until about Monday then bounce back. I have read stories of other people going through BEP who have reported that gentle exercise does serve to keep the body energised, so long as it’s appropriate. Maybe there’s some logic here, to keep the body moving and active to an extent. Or, tomorrow is when I’ll turn to jelly. We live and learn.

Weekend plans are still being drawn up but will be mostly staying at home seeing friends, maybe family too, and getting the housework done. Will the legs ache tomorrow from 2 walks, some shopping and a short ride ? I can’t wait to find out. My main wish though, can I have my taste back please ? I love my food too much.